Shrinked Package – Raisin Boy

The cold skinny dip Well, it all happened back in sophomore year of college. I was a bit arrogant back then, and definitely reckless. And I thought that I was a good card player. Anyway, that set me up for a big embarrassment.

I had gone on a camping trip with five of the guys from the track team at a lake up in Glendalough Park in Minnesota, in the U.S. It was around noon, and we had a bit to drink when we got into a game of cards. Someone thought it would make things more interesting if the losers had to strip down and go for a skinny dip in the lake (which was still freezing cold in early May).

Well, the card game went bad, Jack was the winner and the rest of us lost. Three four of us who lost stuck to the plan, stripped down naked as jay birds (we didn't see anyone around), and jumped in to swim out to a rock and came back. Well, when we were out a way, Jack grabbed the clothes, threw them in the SUV, and started to drive away.

We saw, swam back, and started chasing. He stuck around long enough to snap a few pictures of me and the others on his cell phone and then drove off. There was not so much as a towel around, and the four of us were shivering (and shriveled from the cold...a cold swim leaves a young stud in a rather unflattering condition).

So without other options, we walked over to the park Ranger Post, where as bad luck would have it a 40-something lady ranger was on duty. After bursting into uncontrollable laughter for five minutes, while we stood stark naked, she radioed the other ranger in the park to bring over some blankets. In all, it was the most embarrassing moment of my life.

To make matters worse, Jack emailed the pictures he had taken to some people on campus. I think the whole college saw them, and they started nicknaming us the "prunes" as a jab at all too visible shrinkage of our manhood on full display in the photos.

I couldn't get a date for three months.

One girl turned me down with the cruel but witty line, "Not in your dreams, raisin boy!"